Automatic Bump Finder
On an October morning, the car breezed along the quiet streets of the city. Etta was sitting in the back seat, taking in the views of the cityscape. She hadn’t really realised till today how beautiful an autumn morning could be. The trees, still cloaked in red, yellow, and brown hues, shimmered in the light of the morning sun. Together with the patches of green along the pavements and the towering white buildings, they made the city a breath-taking sight to behold. The quiet lanes looked so peaceful that Etta just wanted to sit back and bask in the tranquillity of this world.
The car stopped at a red light. Alex, who was driving it, looked at his brother Walter and then scanned the dashboard. He nodded slowly. “Nice car, by the way. Very comfy.”
“Yeah,” Walter brightened, patting the dashboard gently, as if it were his pet. His sharp features softened in a satisfied smile and his eyes sparkled behind his glasses. “I wanted a car into which I could fit all of myself. Unlike the one I had before.”
“You can barely fit in most cars,” Alex remarked. As Walter was almost two metres tall and a little wider than he ideally should have been, this statement didn’t surprise Etta.
Walter slowly turned his head towards Alex, glaring at him. The light turned green.
“You’re very tall, that’s why,” Alex defended, donning an innocent look. He cleared his throat and drove the car forward. “I can’t imagine how we’d all fit in your old car,” he continued. “Etta would have had to travel in the boot.”
“I wouldn’t have called that a boot. I couldn’t even fit my groceries in there.”
“That wasn’t the boot's problem.”
At this quip, Walter turned to stare at Alex with such a threatening look that it made Etta’s skin crawl. Alex either didn’t notice Walter or didn’t care about his growing anger. He took a left turn, heading now towards the morning sun. It was so early in the day that the tram moving in parallel with them had only five passengers. One of them was asleep, with his head prodded against a glass window.
After a while, Walter let out a sigh. “I actually liked that car. It was a great drive, but a bit too sporty. Especially for these roads. Other drivers must have thought I was drunk when I tried to avoid all the holes on the roads with that ride.” He waved his hand in front of himself, imitating his previous car slaloming like a snake. “Fortunately, the chassis of this car is placed much higher.”
“I like that,” Alex said with a mischievous smile.
Suddenly, a loud thud arose from underneath the car, Etta was thrown up for a split second before her seatbelt slammed her back into her seat. Glancing quickly through the rear window, she saw a huge dent in the portion of the tarmac path they had just crossed. The car behind them braked softly and drove carefully through it.
“You don’t have to test this car by hitting all the bumps and ditches along the way, you know,” Walter growled, without even deigning to look at Alex.
“I didn’t do it on purpose,” Alex replied in a chaste voice. “Or this,” he added.
Before Etta could even prepare herself, she was bounced off her seat once again, her head narrowly missing the car’s ceiling.
Irritated at his brother’s antics, Walter crossed his arms and growled so perfectly that Etta looked around for a dog for a moment. “At least slow down if you don’t want to avoid the holes,” he muttered through his gritted teeth.
Alex retorted, “It’s not my fault you have installed an ABF.”
“What’s an ABF?” Etta asked.
“Automatic Bump Finder,” Alex clarified, grinning widely before slowly turning to face his brother. Once again they bounced up, this time with a louder thud.
Now Walter turned his head slowly towards Alex, with a sweet smile painted on his face. Etta had never seen anything scarier in her whole life.
“Alright! Alright! I’m done,” Alex lifted his hands off the wheel in a peaceful gesture. Right then, they hit another bump. Genuinely startled this time, Alex quickly grabbed the wheel again and looked at the road. “Oops, sorry, didn’t see that one coming.” He glanced at his brother, whose sweet smile had widened by then. “Seriously! I swear! I didn’t see that one!”
Again they bounced up with another loud thud. Alex cleared his throat. “Just remember this: if you kill me while I’m driving, you’ll kill us all and possibly some other drivers or pedestrians too.”
“You can’t drive forever.”
Alex tapped the steering wheel nervously as they passed the end-of-town. “Challenge excepted!”
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